Laziness, or Lack of Ambition

Okay, I admit that the title is saying the same thing twice, but the one sounds so much better than the other. In any case, I think it describes me way too much lately.

A friend gave me her blog link yesterday and I've started reading through it. Some weeks have six entries in them while others have less, but it looks like at least a couple a week. I'm not saying I'll never to get to that regular of writing, my lack of skills could use it, but it is quite an achievement to get to.

Yesterday was a fun night for young adults at church. I had been told there was one activity I could do, and that's the exact amount I did. There were others that I could have done, but didn't feel like trying. I'm not sure why, but I stayed my usual self and stayed on the sidelines watching everyone else. After activities were concluded, the pastor and I talked briefly about a discussion going on in our denomination.

One of the Christian colleges we support has two professors that are being quite vocal in saying they don't believe the early parts of Genesis. My pastor doesn't agree as far as these profs have gone, but he really doesn't see the point in believing Genesis as written or some of the other views. Two years ago, this is what I had extensive teaching in. I know the possible consequences and how to refute thinking against.

Unfortunately, I was typical Joel and didn't put up a defense. I'm a Christian, I love the Lord, have studied His word extensively and have helped others do the same. I have prayed for opportunity to use the knowledge He has given me, but when the time comes, I sit like a non-moving bump on an expensive log.

Take today for example, it's two days away from the last business day of the month. I could be preparing bills, working on loose ends on a few projects, and several other things. What have I done? Play games, chat via text, and read a blog. Other than adding church, tomorrow will be the same, but at least it's the day of rest.

I'm taking way too many days and hours of rest lately. At this point, breaking that habit is going to be very difficult and unclear how to start. I have been given knowledge on many subjects, but I can't get enough will to actively use it. Starting Monday, I need to make every hour, every minute, of each one I'm given to be used in a productive manner. I fear that if I don't begin, I will continue down a self-destructive road of letting opportunity pass that I cannot afford to lose.