Odd Quad Thoughts

This has been a busy week of laying around a lot. When I get extended amounts of time I don't do much, my mind tends to wonder.

Every day I have a nurse, I do skin checks usually twice a day. It's a simple process of holding a mirror so I can check from head to foot for any red areas, scratches, scrapes, etc. Most of the time, everything is normal, but other times I find clothing may have been too tight or something was poking me in my chair. As I glance everything over, I wonder what it's like to have a body that feels and moves to my command.

I can often see my legs laying in front of me and I wonder what it's like to walk. Walking is something millions of people do on a regular basis without any thought, but I don't remember it. Using my FES bike, I partially experience regular leg movement, but it's only for a short period.

For most of the year, I go barefoot. I am part of an advocacy group promoting the benefits of shedding footwear and a common discussion is feeling different surfaces. The descriptions somewhat make sense, but they are still only something I can guess at as I see my feet lay on my bed or wheelchair foot pedals.

The same thoughts occur with my arms and hands. What's it like to pick up something, get your hands dirty with work, and other common tasks? I likely will never experience any of these things in my life. However, just because I don't feel anything, that doesn't mean my body is incapable of experiencing touch.

All the nerve endings exist in my skin just like everyone else. When they are stimulated though, the signal doesn't go all through my spinal cord for me to register it. I was up in my chair a few times this week and I kept getting much stiffer than usual and more muscle spasms. I did get on my bike to help, but my legs shook and jerked so much that it was difficult to start.

My guess is that the larger pressure sore from camp is starting to heal and is painful when I sit. The best solution is staying off the area and allow it to heal. Unfortunately, that will likely take several months, so it becomes a tricky balancing act of being good for body maintenance and keeping active. This is the first entry I've typed while flat in a long time, but likely not the last.

I'm thankful for the abilities God has given me and continue to be amazed at His creative work in the human body. This week ahead will likely be similar to the last few, but I will see what God has planned.