I am actually still here, not that you can tell by my posts though. The past several weeks of the quad life have had several ups and downs, with even a few loops added in. Unfortunately, most of the downs have been worked related.
Just when I think things are looking up, they get shot down again. One of the design companies I work with had me do a quote for a redesign on a site I have done for them for several years. It was a simple rework, but anything is good for work. About a week later they mailed me that the client made one change, to go with a Wordpress platform, and therefore the designer would not be using me. I wasn't even given a chance to remake my bid, I was just told no. Wordpress may not be an area I'm the most experienced in, but how do you get practice and experience if you're not allowed to do work with it? Hopefully a project will come up that I can work on, but that may be quite a while.
For the past several years, I've had a dream of running a computer basics class; teaching fundamental computer use and helping people improve their skills. With work being slow, I decided it was time to finally give a try and see how it worked. With this being a computer 101 course, I thought advertising online would not work well, so I did an ad on radio, newspaper, and put flyers around town. Today was the day that people were to come find out about the class and signup, two people showed up. A total of four had called to enroll, two of them being the ones that came. Now I'm stuck with the dilemma of trying to have it with just four people or cancel it. I'm currently leaning toward the second choice, but not set on it yet.
Since my last post, Iowa weather has remained cold and rainy, with snow in early May. Thankfully, it has warmed up enough that I've been able to get out barefoot again. My body does much better when I can skip footwear, it's something I notice every year. With fewer muscle spasms and calmer muscles, it's much nicer to get out. Hopefully the warmer temps will stay around through the rest of summer and fall, but Iowa weather is best unpredicted.
Next week, I plan to leave for my volunteer week at CHAMP Camp. With missing last year due to the broken leg, I somewhat feel out of the loop. To my current knowledge, I will be bunking with the older boys and going on the activities with them. I have always worked with younger kids, so teenagers will be a different experience. Another former camper turned counselor has said he can't wait for the week to come, that it's his favorite seven days of the year. I can't say that, but I'm not sure which way I am about it.
On the one hand, I'm looking forward to being useful again and being active, but on the other I'm not looking forward to the toll the week takes on my body. The skin wounds that I've been dealing with for six years were finally starting to improve, although one is not again. After sitting so much for the week, I know they will worsen, but I don't know by how much. I noticed that several of the long time counselors are not returning this year, I think this one has to be my last.
That will be all for this post. Next time could be about the loop a couple caregivers have given, but we'll see. I also need to touch on trouble with DPS and looking ahead in life.
Friday, June 14, 2013
Thursday, March 7, 2013
Ends
Last August, my father and I volunteered to help with a boys' group at our church called Cadets. Since then, we have been in charge of seven boys that range from first through third grade. It has sometimes been a struggle knowing what to do, but it generally was a good time. Yesterday was the last regular meeting of the year and the boys worked on posters to display at an end of the year area Cadet meeting called Cadet-O-Rama. Our group, or cadre, did a family tree badge earlier in the year, so that is what they made their poster on.
With this age group, they weren't exactly sure how to accomplish the task, so our co-counselor and my father made up examples. After dad's was finished, he said he should have started with me since I'm the end of our family line. It has occurred to me before that, without children, I'm ending my family's portion of the tree. Being surrounded by kids, I guess it just stuck a little more than at previous times. I would love to get married and have children, but that has not been in God's plan for this life He has given me. I have done several dating sites, but the free features only go so far. Getting every feature is pretty expensive, so I just remain browsing through matches, but never able to speak with anyone, a lot like real life I guess.
Winter in Iowa is still holding on with continuing snow and cooler temps, but it is showing an end is near. Temperatures are forecasted to be above freezing this next week with more rain than snow expected. I'm looking forward to it being warm again and putting an end to the need of having shoes outside. In college history class, we read a letter by a Native American boy that was brought to a school to be "civilized" into the culture of the white man invading his land. At one point, he said that he "longed to be barefoot" again and was tired of being forced into shoes. In some ways, I think I know how he felt.
I think this is the end of this entry. I'm looking forward to new beginnings in spring and starting a new year of school talks in a few weeks.
With this age group, they weren't exactly sure how to accomplish the task, so our co-counselor and my father made up examples. After dad's was finished, he said he should have started with me since I'm the end of our family line. It has occurred to me before that, without children, I'm ending my family's portion of the tree. Being surrounded by kids, I guess it just stuck a little more than at previous times. I would love to get married and have children, but that has not been in God's plan for this life He has given me. I have done several dating sites, but the free features only go so far. Getting every feature is pretty expensive, so I just remain browsing through matches, but never able to speak with anyone, a lot like real life I guess.
Winter in Iowa is still holding on with continuing snow and cooler temps, but it is showing an end is near. Temperatures are forecasted to be above freezing this next week with more rain than snow expected. I'm looking forward to it being warm again and putting an end to the need of having shoes outside. In college history class, we read a letter by a Native American boy that was brought to a school to be "civilized" into the culture of the white man invading his land. At one point, he said that he "longed to be barefoot" again and was tired of being forced into shoes. In some ways, I think I know how he felt.
I think this is the end of this entry. I'm looking forward to new beginnings in spring and starting a new year of school talks in a few weeks.
Friday, February 15, 2013
February Breathing
I seem to be averaging about one post a month this year, I guess it's somewhat of a schedule to keep to. A blog I used to follow, that also followed me, was taken down a while ago by the owner. Without seeing it and how long it has been since my last post, I don't get reminded as often tho come here.
It's the day after Valentine's Day, that means in another five days, it will be 28 years since I became a quad. A lot has happened in these years, more than I can remember, or sometimes care to remember. The thought of writing a book has been circulating in my mind more along with thinking of the journey God has brought me through. It has not always been a pleasant, or easy, journey, but definitely unique to the life I've been given.
In the past few months, I have been increasing my time on the pacer again and am now going to 5:00 in the morning. I often switch back to it around 7:30-8:00, so I'm getting close to being on it 24/7. I'm somewhat excited to get off the vent completely, but nervous at the same time. The vent is somewhat of a comfort, a familiar item, while my diaphragm pacemaker is still a novelty, even after two years. There are times at night I wake up and think something is wrong with the vent, but it's just that I breathe differently on the DPS. I also have an idea of what amputees call a phantom limb now. A few times, it has felt like my vent tube was pulling on my trach funny, but I didn't have a tube on. Just like you have your limbs all your life, hopefully, I've had tubes long enough that my mind is used to them.
Mid-February also means it's time to start looking ahead to the next few months. I have mailed the schools I plan to speak to this year and am waiting to hear back. This will be the first year I use pictures of when I was on the vent to show the change. It may be a benefit or a distraction, I will have to determine how it goes. I also went ahead and applied to be a counselor at CHAMP Camp this year.
For camp, I haven't quite decided how I'm feeling about it. With missing last year, I'm kind of out of the loop with last year's new kids and activities. I'm looking forward to seeing everyone again, but also concerned about being up so much. June is four months away though, so a lot can change from now to then. See you, my non-existent readers, next time!
It's the day after Valentine's Day, that means in another five days, it will be 28 years since I became a quad. A lot has happened in these years, more than I can remember, or sometimes care to remember. The thought of writing a book has been circulating in my mind more along with thinking of the journey God has brought me through. It has not always been a pleasant, or easy, journey, but definitely unique to the life I've been given.
In the past few months, I have been increasing my time on the pacer again and am now going to 5:00 in the morning. I often switch back to it around 7:30-8:00, so I'm getting close to being on it 24/7. I'm somewhat excited to get off the vent completely, but nervous at the same time. The vent is somewhat of a comfort, a familiar item, while my diaphragm pacemaker is still a novelty, even after two years. There are times at night I wake up and think something is wrong with the vent, but it's just that I breathe differently on the DPS. I also have an idea of what amputees call a phantom limb now. A few times, it has felt like my vent tube was pulling on my trach funny, but I didn't have a tube on. Just like you have your limbs all your life, hopefully, I've had tubes long enough that my mind is used to them.
Mid-February also means it's time to start looking ahead to the next few months. I have mailed the schools I plan to speak to this year and am waiting to hear back. This will be the first year I use pictures of when I was on the vent to show the change. It may be a benefit or a distraction, I will have to determine how it goes. I also went ahead and applied to be a counselor at CHAMP Camp this year.
For camp, I haven't quite decided how I'm feeling about it. With missing last year, I'm kind of out of the loop with last year's new kids and activities. I'm looking forward to seeing everyone again, but also concerned about being up so much. June is four months away though, so a lot can change from now to then. See you, my non-existent readers, next time!
Saturday, January 12, 2013
The Times
I knew it had been a while since I last made an entry, but didn't realize it had been a month. During the break I have been ill and have had some busy days as well. Also since my last post, we had the school shootings in Connecticut. I feel sorry for all the families involved with it, but it's an unfortunate result of the world we live in.
When tragedies like Sandy Hook Elementary occur, people often ask how could a loving God let such a thing happen. I see it as a wake up call, bringing our attention to the world we live in. For an entire generation now, the Bible has been banned from public schools and evolution taught as fact. This teaching says that man is just an accidental byproduct of a random sequence events and that life has no meaning. In evolution, death is normal and is all that we should expect to get out of our time on earth.
With kids growing up being taught this is what they are, it's not surprising that school shootings and mass murders are becoming more frequent. People are simply acting out according to what they have been taught and what they believe. Keeping with the same line of thinking, it is also not surprising that humanism, better known as atheism, continues to grow as well as "gay" marriage and abortion. The world is getting further away from God and is becoming increasingly pervious.
Recently, I read a blog entry by Ken Ham of Answers in Genesis that said about 44 percent of Americans believe humans and animals were created basically as we are today. Despite the increase in evolutionary teaching, that number has pretty well stayed the same in the last 20 years. That's great to hear that it hasn't dropped, but it also means that nearly 66 percent of those poled don't believe we were created mainly as we are today. Mr. Ham doesn't go into the details of this study, but I'm guessing the 66 percent believe in some sort of evolutionary basis.
Reading the Old Testament, you can see a repetitive cycle of God's chosen people, the Israelites, rejecting God and doing as each person saw fit. They are then given warnings, and turned over another nation that mistreats them. After a time, the Israelites repent of their sins, return to the Lord, and He restores them to freedom and prosperous times again.
Looking at today's world, I sometimes wonder if we're not in the warning stages to return to God or suffer the consequences. In Luke 13, Jesus is asked about some people who were killed when a tower fell on them, if they were worse sinners than others. His answer was that we need to repent or will likewise perish.
John 3:16 says "For God so loved the world that He gave his one and only Son..." As sinful humans, we don't deserve anything, but God so loves us that He provided a way for us to be saved.
A number of people I know are expecting to have a child, or two, sometime in 2013. I am excited for them, but am also sad to see the world these children will be born in to. I pray that it changes for the better, but history has shown us that it is not likely, and we do not fully understand God's plan for our futures.
When tragedies like Sandy Hook Elementary occur, people often ask how could a loving God let such a thing happen. I see it as a wake up call, bringing our attention to the world we live in. For an entire generation now, the Bible has been banned from public schools and evolution taught as fact. This teaching says that man is just an accidental byproduct of a random sequence events and that life has no meaning. In evolution, death is normal and is all that we should expect to get out of our time on earth.
With kids growing up being taught this is what they are, it's not surprising that school shootings and mass murders are becoming more frequent. People are simply acting out according to what they have been taught and what they believe. Keeping with the same line of thinking, it is also not surprising that humanism, better known as atheism, continues to grow as well as "gay" marriage and abortion. The world is getting further away from God and is becoming increasingly pervious.
Recently, I read a blog entry by Ken Ham of Answers in Genesis that said about 44 percent of Americans believe humans and animals were created basically as we are today. Despite the increase in evolutionary teaching, that number has pretty well stayed the same in the last 20 years. That's great to hear that it hasn't dropped, but it also means that nearly 66 percent of those poled don't believe we were created mainly as we are today. Mr. Ham doesn't go into the details of this study, but I'm guessing the 66 percent believe in some sort of evolutionary basis.
Reading the Old Testament, you can see a repetitive cycle of God's chosen people, the Israelites, rejecting God and doing as each person saw fit. They are then given warnings, and turned over another nation that mistreats them. After a time, the Israelites repent of their sins, return to the Lord, and He restores them to freedom and prosperous times again.
Looking at today's world, I sometimes wonder if we're not in the warning stages to return to God or suffer the consequences. In Luke 13, Jesus is asked about some people who were killed when a tower fell on them, if they were worse sinners than others. His answer was that we need to repent or will likewise perish.
John 3:16 says "For God so loved the world that He gave his one and only Son..." As sinful humans, we don't deserve anything, but God so loves us that He provided a way for us to be saved.
A number of people I know are expecting to have a child, or two, sometime in 2013. I am excited for them, but am also sad to see the world these children will be born in to. I pray that it changes for the better, but history has shown us that it is not likely, and we do not fully understand God's plan for our futures.
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
December Thanks
I apologize for anyone that does actually read this blog for the long break. Every time I thought about making an entry, I thought of something else. This has not been a priority even though I do like writing. My original intent for this post was to have a list of 31 items thankful for, one for each year I've been given on this earth. I don't know that I'll get up to that many, but we'll see where it ends up.
First off, I'm thankful for the sacrifice of God's son Jesus on the cross of Calvary and His resurrection. As I have said on here, sin is something I struggle with in different ways. I can't imagine going through life without having faith in God and looking to forgiveness when you know you have done wrong.
Second is the family God has given me, especially my parents. I know some in my situation whose parents have completely abandoned them and don't care what happens. We don't always agree on everything, but I am thankful of how my parents raised me and continue to sacrifice time and sometimes their own goals in order to help me. Some days are very difficult for them, especially my mom, but they are always there when needed.
Next would likely be the work God has given me. As I have said in previous posts, the work I have been given is often less than I would prefer, but at least there is some. Not everyone can say that, especially those with severe disabilities, but I do at least have something constructive to do most days.
In general, I'm thankful for this country I have been given to live in. Due to some of the assistance programs established one before I was born, I am able to live outside of a care facility and be a productive member of society. I am also able to freely practice as a Christian without fear of opposition to my beliefs. The last few years have seen laws come about that I don't agree with, but work is being done to turn those around.
That is where I will stop for now, but more may be coming in future entries. We will see when that entry shall be.
First off, I'm thankful for the sacrifice of God's son Jesus on the cross of Calvary and His resurrection. As I have said on here, sin is something I struggle with in different ways. I can't imagine going through life without having faith in God and looking to forgiveness when you know you have done wrong.
Second is the family God has given me, especially my parents. I know some in my situation whose parents have completely abandoned them and don't care what happens. We don't always agree on everything, but I am thankful of how my parents raised me and continue to sacrifice time and sometimes their own goals in order to help me. Some days are very difficult for them, especially my mom, but they are always there when needed.
Next would likely be the work God has given me. As I have said in previous posts, the work I have been given is often less than I would prefer, but at least there is some. Not everyone can say that, especially those with severe disabilities, but I do at least have something constructive to do most days.
In general, I'm thankful for this country I have been given to live in. Due to some of the assistance programs established one before I was born, I am able to live outside of a care facility and be a productive member of society. I am also able to freely practice as a Christian without fear of opposition to my beliefs. The last few years have seen laws come about that I don't agree with, but work is being done to turn those around.
That is where I will stop for now, but more may be coming in future entries. We will see when that entry shall be.
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
November Ramblings
Sorry for the lapse in posting a new entry, but I haven't had a lot to write about since my last post. In the past few weeks, I came across a game called Farming Simulator 2013. It's a game that allows you to do various farming activities to earn money in order to continue to improve your farm and equipment. It will not be available for Apple computers for a few weeks, so I have been watching several videos on YouTube how people play it.
It looks like a game that will hit a number of my interests. The simulation aspect allows me to drive several different vehicles in a somewhat realistic manor and the budget requirements go along with my management interests. Thinking about my gaming past, this will be the first time in several years that I have gotten a completely new game. I have had several expansions to my flight and train simulators, but those just added to the experience. I'm looking forward to the new challenge and hope it will last me several years.
I have been feeling strangely lazy in the last few weeks as well. Spanish has seen little progress and work continues to be pretty slow. Fortunately, this week has been a little busier, so it will hopefully change soon.
That's really all I have at this point. I may put a thanks related article later this week, but we'll see how it goes.
It looks like a game that will hit a number of my interests. The simulation aspect allows me to drive several different vehicles in a somewhat realistic manor and the budget requirements go along with my management interests. Thinking about my gaming past, this will be the first time in several years that I have gotten a completely new game. I have had several expansions to my flight and train simulators, but those just added to the experience. I'm looking forward to the new challenge and hope it will last me several years.
I have been feeling strangely lazy in the last few weeks as well. Spanish has seen little progress and work continues to be pretty slow. Fortunately, this week has been a little busier, so it will hopefully change soon.
That's really all I have at this point. I may put a thanks related article later this week, but we'll see how it goes.
Sunday, November 4, 2012
Writing
Yes, you read the title correctly, I'm writing about writing. It may seem a bit ironic, but it is the subject I've chosen for this post.
Since this past May, I have been writing my own series of lessons in the church newsletter that I am the unofficial editor of. These articles are about how we need to base our thinking upon the Bible, God's word, instead of fallible man's ideas. They are based on the Foundations series by Answers in Genesis, but with my own additions and made for one page articles. Today, the fourth article, out of a planned six, was officially released.
The newsletter goes out every two months, so I've known that I needed to get the article written for quite a while. Unfortunately, I could not get in the right frame of mind to write it and finally made it about one day before it was printed. Since I wasn't in the "writing mood" for it, I struggled to finish the piece and did not feel that I did very well on it. Well, apparently I was wrong about that.
My last newsletter entry received one comment from a church member that it helped her thinking and encouraged further study. I was happy to hear that and that maybe my writing was helpful for people. Today's release though has already had three responses that they liked it, that makes for three times the comment from the last one. I guess it shows that what I think is poor work may not be the case for someone else.
It is my real hope that making these articles available for people will help them to better understand God's word and help to base their thinking from a Christian perspective. I know that my study in this area has helped me, so why not pass on the knowledge I've been given to others. The last two items in the series will be more difficult to deal with, hopefully they will remain a valuable resource for my readers if it is the Lord's will.
Since this past May, I have been writing my own series of lessons in the church newsletter that I am the unofficial editor of. These articles are about how we need to base our thinking upon the Bible, God's word, instead of fallible man's ideas. They are based on the Foundations series by Answers in Genesis, but with my own additions and made for one page articles. Today, the fourth article, out of a planned six, was officially released.
The newsletter goes out every two months, so I've known that I needed to get the article written for quite a while. Unfortunately, I could not get in the right frame of mind to write it and finally made it about one day before it was printed. Since I wasn't in the "writing mood" for it, I struggled to finish the piece and did not feel that I did very well on it. Well, apparently I was wrong about that.
My last newsletter entry received one comment from a church member that it helped her thinking and encouraged further study. I was happy to hear that and that maybe my writing was helpful for people. Today's release though has already had three responses that they liked it, that makes for three times the comment from the last one. I guess it shows that what I think is poor work may not be the case for someone else.
It is my real hope that making these articles available for people will help them to better understand God's word and help to base their thinking from a Christian perspective. I know that my study in this area has helped me, so why not pass on the knowledge I've been given to others. The last two items in the series will be more difficult to deal with, hopefully they will remain a valuable resource for my readers if it is the Lord's will.
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